{"product_id":"if-i-wanted-to-listen-t-shirt","title":"If I Wanted To Listen T Shirt","description":"\u003ch2\u003eFunny Rude T Shirt, If I Wanted To Listen I'd Fart\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEverybody knows at least one person who mistakes volume for wisdom. Rather than arguing with them, simply present the alternative listening arrangement and let the logic speak, or rather trumpet, for itself.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\"Second T shirt from Lion Legion always good quality. Easy to order, quickly sent out. Will order again from them great service.\"\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e(Gillian H.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWith over\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e 16,000 verified reviews\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e, our previous buyers say we supply great quality clothing and provide first-class customer service, so go ahead and order with confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThese are not the same as the thin, cheap, knock-off rubbish you can buy elsewhere. At 180gsm, this is a proper weight, high-quality t-shirt, heavier than most competitors even attempt, and you'll feel the quality the moment you pick it up.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\"Great company to deal with and the customer service is excellent, regular updates keep you well informed about your orders progress and delivery dates.\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe products themselves are of a very high quality.\u003c\/strong\u003e\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e(Brian S.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eStrong, 180gsm heavyweight cotton that holds its shape and lasts a long time.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eCheck the size chart before ordering, sizing runs true for most customers.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eLong length and 'generous' fit - looks great on any physique.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eHigh-definition direct-to-garment print (DTG), sharp and fade-resistant.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eSeamless twin needle collar - sits better on the neck.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTaped neck and shoulders - more comfortable.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTwin needle sleeves and hem - double-stitched for added strength.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTear out label - stops that 'scratchy neck' feeling.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePrinted close to you (UK, US, and other regions).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGo ahead and select your desired colour and size above.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eShipping starts from $4.75 (US) and £3.89 (UK). Exact rates show at checkout.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eFunny Rude T Shirt For Connoisseurs Of The Comeback\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGood old-fashioned toilet humour never went out of style, it just got sharper. If I wanted to listen to an arsehole, I'd fart, is the rare insult that doubles as a fully reasoned argument, and it wins every exchange before the other party has opened their mouth. It sits comfortably among our \u003ca href=\"\/collections\/funny-rude-t-shirts\"\u003efunny rude t shirts\u003c\/a\u003e, a veteran-owned collection where blunt humour is standard issue. No pulse, no sense of humour, no purchase, those are the only entry requirements.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Thinking Behind I'd Fart\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe genius of the line is that it presents flatulence as the more dignified option, which says everything about the person being described. Wearers tend to have a low tolerance for waffle, a well-stocked arsenal of one-liners, and a talent for ending debates with a single raised eyebrow. Barrack-room wit like this deserves proper hardware underneath it, which is why the design is printed on 180gsm heavyweight cotton, a genuinely heavyweight shirt that keeps its shape through every rewearing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eFunny Rude T Shirt That Gets It Right\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA long punchline has to be readable start to finish or the gag collapses halfway, so print quality matters more here than on most designs. High-definition direct-to-garment (DTG) printing keeps every word of the line crisp from first wash to fiftieth. Wear it to the pub quiz where a certain know-it-all holds court, the family gathering with a resident lecturer, or anywhere someone needs the message delivered gently, in writing, at chest height.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eFunny Rude T Shirt FAQ\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat is this funny rude t shirt made from and how is it printed?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis funny rude t shirt is made from strong 180gsm heavyweight cotton with a high-definition direct-to-garment (DTG) print. Wash it inside out at 30 degrees and the full punchline will stay crisp and legible for years of deployments.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow does the sizing run on this design?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSizing on this design runs true for most customers, with a long length and generous fit across sizes S to 5XL. Check the size chart against a shirt you already own, measuring the chest flat from armpit to armpit, before choosing your usual size.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhen will my order ship and can it be personalised?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOrders for the if I wanted to listen design are produced within 1 to 2 days, with shipping typically taking a further 1 to 3 days. Personalisation is not available on this slogan, because the wording is already a complete and perfectly balanced sentence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWho is the If I Wanted To Listen design best suited to?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe design suits anyone with a dry wit and a limited appetite for lectures, from veterans raised on barrack-room banter to civilians who simply appreciate a well-built insult. Coming from a veteran-owned business, the humour is authentically blunt, making it a superb gift for the plain speaker in your life.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Lion Legion","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":39886970257454,"sku":"GD05-BLK-S","price":22.49,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":39886970290222,"sku":"GD05-BLK-M","price":22.49,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":39886970322990,"sku":"GD05-BLK-L","price":22.49,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ X-Large","offer_id":39886970355758,"sku":"GD05-BLK-XL","price":22.49,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2X-Large","offer_id":39886970388526,"sku":"GD05-BLK-2XL","price":22.49,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3X-Large","offer_id":39886970421294,"sku":"GD05-BLK-3XL","price":23.49,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 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