{"product_id":"british-tea-quintessentially-sweatshirt","title":"British Tea Sweatshirt","description":"\u003ch2\u003eBritish Sweatshirt, Quintessentially Tea\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHouse on fire, put the kettle on. Bad news on the phone, put the kettle on. Somebody offers you a coffee, and you put the kettle on anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\"Love that I'm buying from a family-owned company. I wasn't disappointed. Outstanding quality and Service.\"\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e(Martin B.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWith over\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e 16,000 verified reviews\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e, our previous buyers say we supply great quality clothing and provide first-class customer service, so go ahead and order with confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDon't confuse these with the thin, cheap, flimsy specials you can buy elsewhere. This is a heavy, high-quality sweatshirt that feels great, will go the distance, and you will feel the superior quality the moment you touch it.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\"Great shirt, great quality and I highly recommend.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e(Sue W.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e80% ringspun cotton\/20% polyester, a proper heavyweight blend built to last season after season.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eUnisex sizing - Previous customers say it is a great fit for both men and women.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eWeight, a nice and thick 280gsm that feels premium and keeps the cold out.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eSoft cotton-faced fabric - warm as toast.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eCheck the size chart before ordering, sizing runs true for most customers.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eHigh-definition direct-to-garment print (DTG), sharp and fade-resistant.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTaped neck – more comfortable.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTwin needle stitching for added strength.\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eWRAP Certified Production – no sweatshops.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGo ahead and select your desired colour and size above.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eShipping starts from $4.75 (US) and £3.89 (UK). Exact rates show at checkout.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eBritish Sweatshirt For A Nation Of Kettle Botherers\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe tea is not really about the tea and everybody in this country knows it. Making one is a stalling tactic, a way of leaving a room without leaving a room, and a socially acceptable method of doing something with your hands while you work out what on earth to say next. Somebody has had terrible news. Nobody knows the words. So the kettle goes on, and the two minutes it takes to boil gives everyone time to arrange their faces. It also functions as an offer of company without anybody having to say anything soppy out loud, which suits the national temperament perfectly. The joke on the front only works because it is not really a joke, it is an accurate documentary observation that happens to be funny when written down. Anybody wearing it is quietly confirming they have used the tactic themselves, probably this week. At 280gsm, it is warm enough to be the sweatshirt worn while making the tea in a cold kitchen.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eThe Thinking Behind Quintessentially British\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eObservational humour has to be genuinely accurate or it collapses. Miss by an inch and it reads as somebody performing Britishness rather than describing it, which is instantly noticeable and slightly embarrassing. The three-line structure works because the escalation is real. Crisis, tiredness, and then the coffee line that shows the whole thing has stopped being a response to anything and become pure reflex. That final turn is what makes people laugh, because it is the bit they recognise in themselves. Nothing gets explained afterwards, which is the other half of the trick. It sits comfortably in the wider \u003ca href=\"\/collections\/patriotic-t-shirt-gb\"\u003epatriotic shirts\u003c\/a\u003e range as the gentler end of it, since this is affection rather than flag-waving. Nobody is being told what to think about anything, which is a pleasant change on a design with British in the name.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eBritish Sweatshirt That Gets It Right\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMulti-line text is the hardest thing to lay out well on a chest. Line spacing has to carry the rhythm of the joke, because a punchline crammed too close to the setup arrives before the reader is ready for it. Get the spacing right and the timing survives being read across a room. Print quality then decides whether it keeps working. Direct-to-garment printing bonds ink into the fibres so the lines stay legible through years of washing rather than cracking apart mid-sentence, which on a text design is fatal. Jet Black runs the full range to 5XL, with Charcoal, Olive Green and Oxford Navy available at identical fabric weight.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eBritish Sweatshirt FAQ\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat is this British sweatshirt made from and how is it printed?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAn 80% ringspun cotton and 20% polyester blend at 280gsm, thick enough for standing in a cold kitchen waiting for a kettle. Printing is direct-to-garment, keeping multi-line text crisp and readable. Wash inside out at 30 degrees and the lettering stays sharp for years.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow does the sizing run on this sweatshirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUnisex sizing that follows standard UK sizing, so your usual size fits most people comfortably. Take one size up if you prefer extra room or plan to layer underneath. Chest measurements are listed in inches on the size chart for a quick check.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow quickly is it made and can the lines be changed?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduction takes 1 to 2 working days, then shipping runs 1 to 3 days depending on your address. Custom wording is not offered, as the line spacing is set specifically to make the timing land. Orders placed early in the week usually arrive before the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWho is this design actually for?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyone who has ever solved an unsolvable problem by filling a kettle, which is most of the country. Excellent as a gift for the household tea maker, who will recognise themselves immediately. Works at home, at work, and awkwardly at other people's houses.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Lion Legion","offers":[{"title":"X-Small \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843553326,"sku":"JH030-JBK-XS","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Small \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843586094,"sku":"JH030-JBK-S","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Medium \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843618862,"sku":"JH030-JBK-M","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Large \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843651630,"sku":"JH030-JBK-L","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Large \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843684398,"sku":"JH030-JBK-XL","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2X-Large \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843717166,"sku":"JH030-JBK-2XL","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3X-Large \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843749934,"sku":"JH030-JBK-3XL","price":33.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"4X-Large \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843782702,"sku":"JH030-4XL-JBK","price":33.69,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"5X-Large \/ Jet Black","offer_id":40311843815470,"sku":"JH030-5XL-JBK","price":34.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Small \/ Olive Green","offer_id":40311843848238,"sku":"JH030-XS-OLI","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Small \/ Olive Green","offer_id":40311843881006,"sku":"JH030-S-OLI","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Medium \/ Olive Green","offer_id":40311843913774,"sku":"JH030-M-OLI","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Large \/ Olive Green","offer_id":40311843946542,"sku":"JH030-L-OLI","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Large \/ Olive Green","offer_id":40311843979310,"sku":"JH030-XL-OLI","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2X-Large \/ Olive Green","offer_id":40311844012078,"sku":"JH030-2XL-OLI","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Small \/ Oxford Navy","offer_id":40311844044846,"sku":"JH030-XS-OXN","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Small \/ Oxford Navy","offer_id":40311844077614,"sku":"JH030-S-OXN","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Medium \/ Oxford Navy","offer_id":40311844110382,"sku":"JH030-M-OXN","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Large \/ Oxford Navy","offer_id":40311844143150,"sku":"JH030-L-OXN","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Large \/ Oxford Navy","offer_id":40311844175918,"sku":"JH030-XL-OXN","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2X-Large \/ Oxford Navy","offer_id":40311844208686,"sku":"JH030-2XL-OXN","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Small \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844241454,"sku":"JH030-XS-CHA","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Small \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844274222,"sku":"JH030-S-CHA","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Medium \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844306990,"sku":"JH030-M-CHA","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Large \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844339758,"sku":"JH030-L-CHA","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"X-Large \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844372526,"sku":"JH030-XL-CHA","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"2X-Large \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844405294,"sku":"JH030-2XL-CHA","price":32.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"3X-Large \/ Charcoal","offer_id":40311844438062,"sku":"JH030-3XL-CHA","price":33.19,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0268\/4089\/1438\/files\/quintessentially-british-sweatshirt-30316259672110.png?v=1710739626","url":"https:\/\/lionlegion.co.uk\/products\/british-tea-quintessentially-sweatshirt","provider":"Lion Legion","version":"1.0","type":"link"}